My Superpower

Hi, my name is Beth.  I am--was--just like any other adult of my generation: struggling to balance work and home life, trying to pay attention to my health in a fast-food era, always on the look-out for the next pair of I-have-to-have-them shoes.  But then that night . . .

It was another humid summer's evening in a series of humid summer evenings.  I had been practicing my ability to gracelessly fumble down a dark hallway to shower away the sheen of moisture I'd accumulated when the air conditioner kicked off for a mere 10 seconds.  The light fixture in the shower stall had recently been cleaned and the bulb replaced; it hadn't worked since I moved in and I was looking forward to actually finding the soap with my eyes.  I midjudged the distance between the doorjam and my shoulder (a hazard that coincides with wearing pyjamas) then blindly searched for the correct hoosie on the Great Wall of Bathroom Switches.

"Unngh" I said as I congratulated myself on finally finding the right whatnot.  A mere flip away from a shower and . . .

[TINK!]

The new bulb burned out!

**  **

Now, you may think to yourself that this is an ordinary, everyday occurrance.  I thought so, too, until the following night.

**  **

Another sticky, breezeless night.  My goal: to infiltrate The Detached Garage in search of Space To Stick These Bookcases.  I donned my best scuffed shoes and pulled my hair back so my fantastically magical hair (it stays frizzy in ALL weather conditions!) would not impede my ability to spot the tiniest bit of available floor space.  I flung open the back door and threw the switch for the exterior garage light in anticipation of the mission ahead, and what happened but . . .

[TINK!]

The bulb burned out!!

**  **

It was then I realized that not only was I normally amazing (with magical hair) but that I ALSO HAD SUPER POWERS!!  I had a few seconds of doubt, however.  I asked myself, "Could this be possible?  Could this be true?" but I knew there was no denying the strange, seemingly unconnected events.  I vowed then that I would use my powers only for good; for truth, justice, and the illuminated way!  They shall call me . . . BURNOUT!