Announcing . . . (the bedroom media blurb)

[I wrote this for fun to my mom and sister via an email, thought I'd share. Plans to have photos of the reorganization posted this weekend, early next week. -B]

You've seen the Disarray!
You've seen the Chaos!!

Now see the Difference!

The corporate partners of E.A. Johnston, Inc (Me, Myself, and I) are announcing the opening of their newest development site "The Bedroom ad Nauseum." This latest site follows close on the heels of related sites and products released since 2007, including their most famous series "My Living Room is a Lightless Hole Devoid of All Happiness" and "Ma, The Terlet Is Crooked."

"The Bedroom" has long been promised for release since early fall 2007, but has yet to meet its potential. With the early opening this week, E.A. Johnston sends out a nod to eager fans with the understanding that a project of this size and importance cannot be kept from the public eye.

"We realized early in the design process that the Bedroom project was going to be a huge success," says co-founder and partner Me. "What we didn't anticipate was the length of time involved or the demand for interim reports. The process itself has become a type of living art, changing week to week, and the public are interested."

To meet rising public demand for access to the development, E.A. Johnston, Inc has opened The Bedroom as an evolving display, with clear intention to allow regular access and media updates tracking the progress as it continues toward completion. According to Myself, "it has finally reached a point where we can have visitors tour the project without safety concerns."

The Bedroom makes its feature debut this weekend, sporting an improved "studio" area, a refurbished reading nook, and dust-free surfaces. "We're most excited about the floor . . . you can see the floor now!" said one happy employee.

Company partners still have their eye on the ultimate prize, however. The bulk of the work, according to a company spokeswoman, is with the wall resurfacing and repairs. "It'll be some time before that aspect of the project is complete," she stated to our correspondent, "and we just couldn't wait that long. With the opening, however, we've reorganized the site schedule such that the public will see more 'little changes' in the immediate future, but the crowning achievement of painting the walls will be the final touch. We believe it will really provide a memorable impact for the project as a whole."

Updates scheduled for the near future will include bookcase doors, wall art and memo board, curtains, a green space, and furniture refinishing and repair. Wall resurfacing and repair continues at a slow pace, but is making progress; Phase Two (plaster repair) expects to commence in September.